C++ and classes

Jarvis, Robert P. (Contingent) Jarvisb at timken.com
Wed Sep 13 15:41:39 UTC 2000


> -----Original Message-----
> From: Peter Novak [mailto:pno at whitestein.com]
> Sent: Wednesday, September 13, 2000 10:02 AM
> 
> Hi,
> I found this in Wrox Press C++ Tutorial to Visual C++. Nice...
> 
> Peter.
> 
> ----------------
> START OF CITE
> The notion of class was invented by an Englishman to keep the general
> population happy. It derives from the theory that people who 
> knew their place and function in society would be much more secure
> and comfortable in life than those who did not. The famous Dane,
> Bjarne Stroustrup, who invented C++, undoubtedly acquired a deep
> knowledge of class concepts while at Cambridge University in England,
> and appropriated the idea very successfully for use in his new
> language.
> END OF CITE

A perfect example of the "I don't know the facts so I'll make them up as I
go" school of writing.  <snort!>  I have this sort of Monty Python-esque
skit playing in my head...let's listen in...

	Individual #1:  Hail and good morrow, friend!
	Individual #2:  An' to you as well, friend.
	Individual #1:  Say, do you happen to know your place and function
				in society?
	Individual #2:  Hrrmmm...  Welll, Oi, 'adn't really given it
				much thought, meself, but now as you mention
it,
				no, Oi can't say as Oi do.
	Individual #1:  And don't you find that a bit disturbing?
	Individual #2:  Disturbing, you say?  'ow's that?
	Individual #1:  Wellllll, if you don't know your place and function
				in society there's no telling the kinds of
trouble
				you might find yourself in.  For example, if
you
				were to be invited to a fancy dress party
what
				would you wear, eh?
	Individual #2:  <scratches head>  Oi think Oi see summat of what
				you mean...
	Individual #1:  Preeee-cisely!  And that is why I have invented
				the new concept of class!
	Individual #2:  Class?
	Individual #1:  Yes.  You see, if each of us is a member of or, if
				you like, *has* a class, then each and every
one
				of us will know his or her or (in rare cases
				involving work as a harem guard) its own
place
				in society, thus allowing us all to function
				together as a cohesive unit, subdividing
				responsibilities equitably amongst everyone
and
				ensuring that all necessary tasks are
completed
				by those with the greatest level of
expertise.
	Individual #2:  Oi see...<scratches head again, looks puzzled>
	Individual #1:  Stout fellow!  <pulls out small notebook>  Now,
				let's see here - what sort of work have you
				been performing of late?
	Individual #2:  Well, lately Oi've been planting a bit of barley,
				chopping some wood...
	Individual #1:  Yes, I see...
	Individual #2:  ...and then there's always the slopping of the
pigs...
	Individual #1:  Slopping of pigs...yes, go on...
	Individual #2:  ...and Oi've been doing quite a bit of mucking out
				the barn, as well...Oi'm quite proud of
that, and
				the cows seem to like it...
	Individual #1:  Ah-ha!  It would seem, then, that your class should
				be "peasant"!
	Individual #2:  "Peasant"?  Is that all you've got available?
	Individual #1:  I'm afraid so...
	Individual #2:  Not even a "thrall" or "churl", or maybe a nice bit
				of "serf"?
	Individual #1:  Well, I suppose we could manage a "thrall" or
"serf",
				if you like...but those are going to be
phased out
				in a few hundred years...
	Individual #2:  Oi see...  Well, if there's no future in those other
				thingies...
	Individual #1:  Classes...
	Individual #2:  Roight, classes...Oi guess I'll go with "peasant".
	Individual #1:  *Very* good!  Now, don't you feel better?
	Peasant:        Can't really say as Oi do, exactly...
	Individual #1:  Well, I'm sure it will grow on you...
	Peasant:        Say, what class will *you* be having, then?
	Individual #1:  <consults notebook>  <sigh>  It looks like the only
				class with openings is..."King".
	Peasant:        "King"?
	King:           Yes, 'fraid so...
	Peasant:	    That certainly sounds a bit of all right to
me...
	King:           Oh, I don't know...there's all those fancy dress
				parties to go to...ogling the canapes all
night...
				gnawing on the serving wenches...
	Peasant:        Oi think Oi could get used to that!
	King:           Still, I suppose someone has to do it, and I
wouldn't
				want to leave it to some poor unfortunate...
I'll
				do it!
	Peasant:        Good on you, your kingshipness!
	King:           Thank you.  Well, I'm off to do more kinging!  You
				just get on with your peasanting, all right?
	Peasant:        Thank 'ee, sir, thank 'ee...
	King:           By the way, have I mentioned my other interesting
				idea..?
	Peasant:        Other idea..?
	King:           Yes, it sounds like just oodles of fun.
	Peasant:        Oh..?
	King:           Yes.  It's called, "taxes"...

:-)

Bob Jarvis
Compuware @ Timken





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