Hi Rob,

I'm so sorry you felt that way.  I know you have had major issues, you have
said the same yourself.  I'm always happy to see you come back even after
long absences.  You are a brilliant coder and it has been my distinct
pleasure to work with you on Cryptography!  Thank you for all you have done
and indeed you are responsible for adding significant value to Squeak and
the community.

We all work on code and it's easy to work your ass off on something to make
it work and forget where it originated.  We all contribute in large and
small ways to everything.  If you started VMMaker thank you!  It is
definitely something a lot of us use.  I remember learning all about it a
long long time ago before I realized that while I could understand it and I
could use it, the people that work on the VM are a level higher than me.  I
just make apps!

I remember getting in an argument with Andreas about adding methods to
collection.  "WE DON"T NEED more methods in Collection we need to remove
most of them and make it easier!" I argued with him about the value over
and over but he insisted that they just didn't add enough value.  I could
have been put off.  I could have assumed that Andreas didn't like me but I
would have been very wrong!  I was really honored to get the chance to work
with him and we became great friends.  Of course I added my methods to the
code we were working on together and was so thrilled when he used my
methods for his own code.

I don't know what happened with VMMaker but again thank you for
your participation in it.. I wanted to take a minute to thank you for your
work and to let you know it is my honor to work with you too!  I hope that
you can come to terms with your past and that you get the help you need for
your CPTSD.

Everything is possible, the past is gone, but the future is still yours to
shape.  I wish the past was set in stone but even that moves and slips.  I
was talking to my wife about a party we attended: "Remember in 2000 we were
at the party and counted down the new year and someone hit the breaker and
killed the lights!  We were all talking about what would happen in the year
2000, would everything break!"  Great story except that I hadn't met my
wife yet!  The past is only what we remember but the future is something we
have control over.  Peace, calm, happyness, they are all hard to come by
but they are possible.  I wish you success in finding what makes your
future better.

I'm sorry about the bad things that have happened to you in the past.  As
far as I'm concerned, you are welcomed here!

All the best,

Ron Teitelbaum



On Thu, Oct 1, 2020 at 10:38 PM Robert Withers via Squeak-dev <
squeak-dev at lists.squeakfoundation.org> wrote:

> :sob::sob::sob:
> On 10/1/20 10:34 PM, Robert Withers wrote:
>
> I wrote to the #general Squeak Slack channel:
>
> What a complete larcenous bastard. 20 years ago, this month, published it
> as his own work. And been against me ever since. My CPTSD (100% veteran
> service-connected) comes with an exquisitely sensitive deception meter.
> There are those who shunned me and ostracized me and made me feel MOST
> UNWELCOME. For  20 years. My delusions kick in and I start suspecting back
> channel communications against me. My love for Squeak conflicted with what
> I knew was happening. but I hung in there and worked on Cryptography, work
> with a group of great people and that I am satisfied with its added value
> to Squeak. For 20 years I KNEW people were against me in the community. I
> cannot describe how negatively this affected me. My third suicide attempt,
> in 2007 I jumped off the roof of a 6 story apartment building and broke my
> back along with many bones. God did not want me to die, yet, so I lived.
> This deception and ostracism is most well highlighted by the taking credit
> for my work, without attribution. He is a complete tool. SHAME!
>
> I do not know the degree to which he spoke against me. I *imagine* it was
> ever since 2000. Delusions! What is real? I knew not. So much torment!
> AGONY! They do not welcome me! They are trying to chase me off! Good grief,
> Charlie Brown.
>
> Severely exacerbated my CPTSD! I kept trying to kill myself because of it!
> I thought I had done something egregiously wrong. Whatever it was it had to
> be my fault. I was not feeling the love, even from myself.
>
> :scream:
>
> :scream:
>
>
> In 2017, 900 units of insulin brought my blood glucose below 40. I almost
> succeeded that time.
>
> :scream:
>
> rww
> On 10/1/20 8:55 PM, Robert Withers wrote:
>
> The worst sort of person is one who takes the credit for the work of
> another. Wouldn't you agree?
>
> You may wish to hear John's judgement on the matter. He was right there
> when it was first built.
>
> If you are not humble you will be humiliated, and brought low.
>
> rww
>
> On 10/1/20 8:35 PM, tim Rowledge wrote:
>
> On 2020-10-01, at 4:57 PM, Robert Withers via Squeak-dev <squeak-dev at lists.squeakfoundation.org> <squeak-dev at lists.squeakfoundation.org> wrote:
>
> I am curious. Who was the original author of the VMMaker Tool?
>
> That would be me; back in exobox days. Written along with the original VMMaker and intended to be an example of clean, tidy, morphic usage. I've no idea if anyone ever uses it now, since running it via scripting has proven more valuable.
>
>
> tim
> --
> tim Rowledge; tim at rowledge.org; http://www.rowledge.org/tim
> "Wibble" said Pooh the stress beginning to show.
>
>
>
>
> --
> K, r
>
> --
> K, r
>
>
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